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Nyrram
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Posted - 2006.07.01 05:58:00 -
[1]
Save yourselves, stay home.
From the opening credits, Superman Returns was going to suck, and suck big time. How did I know? Well, they spent all this effort to make a "super cool" panning 3D voyage from Krypton to Earth, and all the textures are so low-res they are PIXELATED... (Try not to dwell on the absurdly low quality of the Daily Planet globe textures either)
Then the plot... Superman has been away exploring the ruins of Krypton.. ok.. but.. if he gets his superpowers from the rays of OUR sun.. how did he manage to go halfway across the galaxy without.. wouldn't exposure to that much Kryptonite at the ruins.. nevermind.. just accept it and move on.
They transformed Lex from a deliciously clever schemer into this sinister madman who is completely inept and laughably irrelevant. His henchmen are non-threatening and boring.. his weapons are conventional and boring.. his dialog is trite and.. boring? NOT LEX. And one of the most idiotic things is that Lex rants through half the movie about how he will use these super technologically advanced weapons to defend himself with the **** hits the fan... and then.. he runs away like a little girl? No super weapons, Lex?
And don't even get me started on the "Superman is our Savior" turd of an understory. You need both hands to count the number of times during the movie that Superman conveniently strikes the "Jesus pose" with both arms outstretched, legs arranged close together, almost crossed... Superman is NOT JESUS, dangit!!!
And somehow, during the "continuing storyline", all the characters have gotten 10 years younger. Lois Lane is now in her early 20's, has a 5 year old kid (who looks more like 9), and well.. no, I can't go on, I'm sorry.. It's too painful.
Let's just say that Superman Returns not only missed the mark, it was shooting at a different target on another range in a distant town from a foreign country on an alient planet.. using a 1400mm Large Artillery after being hit with 10 Tracking Disruptors.. "Superman Returns completely misses Target Audience, inflicting Massive Boredom"
-- Nyrram |
Kata Dakini
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Posted - 2006.07.01 06:59:00 -
[2]
You paid $10 or whatever it costs to see a movie nowadays to find all this out? I've seen the preview on TV two or three times and I could have told you all this.
Independant and foreign films ftw.
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Sakura Nihil
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Posted - 2006.07.01 07:59:00 -
[3]
Edited by: Sakura Nihil on 01/07/2006 07:59:49 I'm not sure about the Jesus pose, I didn't exactly have that leap out at me when I watched it...
...and as for getting his power, its from yellow sunlight in general, not just our sun, so there you go .
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Corovus
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Posted - 2006.07.01 09:52:00 -
[4]
Originally by: Sakura Nihil
...and as for getting his power, its from yellow sunlight in general, not just our sun, so there you go .
If I remember my Superman canon correctly, Krypton had a red sun...
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Luc Boye
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Posted - 2006.07.01 11:03:00 -
[5]
It's kinda pointless to make another superman movie without Cristopher Reeve, nobody can be corny and cool at the same time.
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Burga Galti
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Posted - 2006.07.01 12:47:00 -
[6]
Originally by: Corovus
Originally by: Sakura Nihil
...and as for getting his power, its from yellow sunlight in general, not just our sun, so there you go .
If I remember my Superman canon correctly, Krypton had a red sun...
I thought Krypton exploded, hence him being sent to earth in the first place? - No-one provokes me with impunity.
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Laythun
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Posted - 2006.07.01 13:27:00 -
[7]
Originally by: Burga Galti
Originally by: Corovus
Originally by: Sakura Nihil
...and as for getting his power, its from yellow sunlight in general, not just our sun, so there you go .
If I remember my Superman canon correctly, Krypton had a red sun...
I thought Krypton exploded, hence him being sent to earth in the first place?
thats what i thought.
See You In Space Cowboy |
Rift Scorn
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Posted - 2006.07.01 15:59:00 -
[8]
damn
I was hoping for this to be a blinder as well
Your friendly clone activation expert, free of service to the eve community since '03! |
Ithuriel
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Posted - 2006.07.01 16:06:00 -
[9]
Will never be another good Superman movie until they bring General Zod back. Guy I worked with saw it, said it started out ok but turned into chick movie. He said best thing about it was the Spiderman 3 trailer, which I then went home and watched, looks good. I also saw interview with Bryan Singer where they asked about the whole Superman/Jesus thing. His reponse was classic. Something like, "Well, I'm Jewish, so..."
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Jenny Spitfire
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Posted - 2006.07.01 16:12:00 -
[10]
Edited by: Jenny Spitfire on 01/07/2006 16:14:24
Superman's origin is inspired through Jesus and related literature though. The holy trinity, Jor-El, wife and son. Gave their only son away to show Humans guidance. They can be great people, they only lack the light... Many other references, just have to read and follow, methinks.
Superman returns isnt about Superman. It is about what Superman is all about. The man, the myth, the legend and the character. It is about what he represents, the all good in a person. ---------------- RecruitMe@NOINT!
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Ithuriel
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Posted - 2006.07.01 16:20:00 -
[11]
I'm not denying the whole messiah thing. Just liked his comment. But from eveything I've heard, this movie isn't very good. If that's the case, kind of upsets me that Singer felt need to do this movie and left X-Men 3 in hands of guy who did Rush Hour. These sort of movies are bound to happen though, with success of X-Men, Spiderman, and Batman Begins, people wanna cash in. I heard they may be working on Watchmen movie, now that could be great. Rorschach ftw.
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Jenny Spitfire
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Posted - 2006.07.01 16:36:00 -
[12]
/me finds Superman Returns is worth watching.
Some ratings to give you an idea of my taste for movies.
Superman Returns 8/10 X-Men - 8/10 The Matrix - 9/10 X-Men 2 - 7/10 Mr and Mrs Smith - 8/10 X-Men 3 - 5/10 LOTR Triology - 7/10 ---------------- RecruitMe@NOINT!
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Sakura Nihil
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Posted - 2006.07.01 20:46:00 -
[13]
Edited by: Sakura Nihil on 01/07/2006 20:48:14
Originally by: Jenny Spitfire /me finds Superman Returns is worth watching.
Some ratings to give you an idea of my taste for movies.
Superman Returns 8/10 X-Men - 8/10 The Matrix - 9/10 X-Men 2 - 7/10 Mr and Mrs Smith - 8/10 X-Men 3 - 5/10 LOTR Triology - 7/10
Aww, X-Men 3 is better than 5/10...otherwise ya, pretty much.
Originally by: Burga Galti
Originally by: Corovus
Originally by: Sakura Nihil
...and as for getting his power, its from yellow sunlight in general, not just our sun, so there you go .
If I remember my Superman canon correctly, Krypton had a red sun...
I thought Krypton exploded, hence him being sent to earth in the first place?
Krypton did have a red sun, hence why their populace wasn't all able to fly around. That also explains why General Zod gained superpowers upon his arrival on Earth, cuz of the yellow sun .
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Sarmaul
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Posted - 2006.07.01 20:58:00 -
[14]
Originally by: Sakura Nihil Edited by: Sakura Nihil on 01/07/2006 20:48:14
Originally by: Jenny Spitfire /me finds Superman Returns is worth watching.
Some ratings to give you an idea of my taste for movies.
Superman Returns 8/10 X-Men - 8/10 The Matrix - 9/10 X-Men 2 - 7/10 Mr and Mrs Smith - 8/10 X-Men 3 - 5/10 LOTR Triology - 7/10
Aww, X-Men 3 is better than 5/10...otherwise ya, pretty much.
Yeah 6/10 :)
TEAM MINMATAR FORUMS - In Rust We Trust - Suvetar, care to confirm these rumours about you being an unstoppable sex machine? LOL -Suvetar |
Torin
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Posted - 2006.07.01 21:29:00 -
[15]
I considered Superman 3 a very good movie.
But maybe it appeals to an older audience than to a younger audience.
Each to his own.
Red Bone Reborn |
Kalaan Oratay
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Posted - 2006.07.02 00:41:00 -
[16]
Originally by: Torin I considered Superman 3 a very good movie.
But maybe it appeals to an older audience than to a younger audience.
Each to his own.
I make this to be Superman 5
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Torin
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Posted - 2006.07.02 01:59:00 -
[17]
Oops, yeah. Typo. :) Superman Returns I mean.
Red Bone Reborn |
aeti
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Posted - 2006.07.02 02:29:00 -
[18]
blame all the problems with this film on meridius tbh
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Meridius
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Posted - 2006.07.02 04:27:00 -
[19]
- _____
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Kurren
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Posted - 2006.07.02 04:36:00 -
[20]
No kidding... a boring movie based off of a DC Comic... that never happens
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SobaKai.com
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BlueSmok
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Posted - 2006.07.02 05:13:00 -
[21]
Edited by: BlueSmok on 02/07/2006 05:14:22
Originally by: Nyrram
Then the plot... Superman has been away exploring the ruins of Krypton.. ok.. but.. if he gets his superpowers from the rays of OUR sun.. how did he manage to go halfway across the galaxy without.. wouldn't exposure to that much Kryptonite at the ruins.. nevermind.. just accept it and move on.
Strange I immediately leaped on the reasoning that he flew inside that giant crystal which "crash landed" back on earth near his parents house like a kid limping home.
Originally by: Nyrram
They transformed Lex from a deliciously clever schemer into this sinister madman who is completely inept and laughably irrelevant. His henchmen are non-threatening and boring.. his weapons are conventional and boring.. his dialog is trite and.. boring? NOT LEX. And one of the most idiotic things is that Lex rants through half the movie about how he will use these super technologically advanced weapons to defend himself with the **** hits the fan... and then.. he runs away like a little girl? No super weapons, Lex?
You could be right about Kevin spacy, but given how much he was covered I think it was assumed we knew his character well, and fully expected him to be wacko. As for not making the super weapons, I think he wanted to get superman delt with first. Cause this is where the movie ****es me off, the island lex creates is suppose to have the same effect as cryptonite and I won't spoil the ending, he shouldn't have been able to handle it.. and someone else... should of come forward and "save the day" that would of been ground breaking superman movie..
Originally by: Nyrram
And don't even get me started on the "Superman is our Savior" turd of an understory. You need both hands to count the number of times during the movie that Superman conveniently strikes the "Jesus pose" with both arms outstretched, legs arranged close together, almost crossed... Superman is NOT JESUS, dangit!!!
Never entered my mind.. you think about this stuff often?
Originally by: Nyrram
And somehow, during the "continuing storyline", all the characters have gotten 10 years younger. Lois Lane is now in her early 20's, has a 5 year old kid (who looks more like 9), and well.. no, I can't go on, I'm sorry.. It's too painful.
You know there is a time for realizum, like when kids at school learn about war.. but not when it's costing me 24$ for me and my wife to watch this, I wanna see a hot chick!
Originally by: Nyrram
Let's just say that Superman Returns not only missed the mark, it was shooting at a different target on another range in a distant town from a foreign country on an alient planet.. using a 1400mm Large Artillery after being hit with 10 Tracking Disruptors.. "Superman Returns completely misses Target Audience, inflicting Massive Boredom"
I won't say Superman returns hits the mark, mostly because of my disagreement on the outcome of the movie. I was a nice novelty having the 3d, reminded me of being a kid. One thumb up :)
If you're not flying with Hippies, you're not having FUN. |
Indomitus Rex
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Posted - 2006.07.02 07:19:00 -
[22]
I could've told you the movie blew. Why? It's about a character who's name is Super. . .Man. Come on.
At least name him ExtraordinaryMan or SuperiorMan or something a little longer than five letters.
Spiderman. Batman. Superman. Snore. Do not discuss moderation - Cathath |
fairimear
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Posted - 2006.07.02 09:31:00 -
[23]
Hate superman. much looking forward to PotC 2
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KingsGambit
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Posted - 2006.07.02 10:00:00 -
[24]
Originally by: Jenny Spitfire Some ratings to give you an idea of my taste for movies.
The Matrix - 9/10
Originally by: Jenny Spitfire LOTR Triology - 7/10
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My T2 Shop |
IonHammer
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Posted - 2006.07.02 11:39:00 -
[25]
Yes this was although i didnt snore as loudly as i did when i watched hell boy at the movies.
I think the critics got it right when they said they really needed to make it contempary with our times instead of a rehash of the past.
Was fun in parts. but pretty disappointing
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Corunna ElMan
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Posted - 2006.07.02 18:24:00 -
[26]
Originally by: Nyrram if he gets his superpowers from the rays of OUR sun.. how did he manage to go halfway across the galaxy without..
Did you miss the GIGANTIC KRYPTONIAN SPACESHIP he crashlands into the Kent farm in the first five minutes of the movie?
Quote: wouldn't exposure to that much Kryptonite at the ruins..
Not all Kryptonian rock is Kryptonite, apparently... just the radioactive stuff.
Quote: Superman is NOT JESUS, dangit!!!
No... they killed Jesus.
You're entitled to your own opinion, however misinformed it may be. - - - - - "Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance." - Sam Brown
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Kalaan Oratay
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Posted - 2006.07.02 23:06:00 -
[27]
Originally by: Corunna ElMan
Originally by: Nyrram if he gets his superpowers from the rays of OUR sun.. how did he manage to go halfway across the galaxy without..
Did you miss the GIGANTIC KRYPTONIAN SPACESHIP he crashlands into the Kent farm in the first five minutes of the movie?
Now Ive not seen the film, but Im pretty sure he means 'how does Superman get back to to Krypton' - does he fly? In which case, the OP's got a point
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Epoch
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Posted - 2006.07.03 00:20:00 -
[28]
the matrix 9/10? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Meridius
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Posted - 2006.07.03 00:49:00 -
[29]
Originally by: Kalaan Oratay
Originally by: Corunna ElMan
Originally by: Nyrram if he gets his superpowers from the rays of OUR sun.. how did he manage to go halfway across the galaxy without..
Did you miss the GIGANTIC KRYPTONIAN SPACESHIP he crashlands into the Kent farm in the first five minutes of the movie?
Now Ive not seen the film, but Im pretty sure he means 'how does Superman get back to to Krypton' - does he fly? In which case, the OP's got a point
He doesn't fly there, he takes the crystal ship. The return to krypton sequence was actually complete, it got cut due to length constraints. It might be in the DVD. Watching it will explain why he doesn't come back to earth in pristine condition - _____
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GlowSticky
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Posted - 2006.07.03 00:53:00 -
[30]
For the OP:
Superman probably got to Krypton by some unknown method of transport that only he had access to. Also, Krypton IS NOT Kryptonite. Kryptonite (that which Superman is allergic to) has been contamintaed by space travel. Krypton (the planet) has not flown through worm-holes and around Jupiter; thus, it is non-toxic to Superman.
Something I did wonder about though was the state of Krypton. If I remember correctly, it was destroyed and that's why Superman was shot into space.
On a lighter note, did anyone else find the flashback scene a little unnecessary? To me it only seemed like a teaser for everyone and was only in the movie for the trailer. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(\_/) (O.o) (> <) The WTF Bunny!
Originally by: Kylania Childhood -> Not Enough Hugs From Mother -> Pirate
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