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Valoche Mrehl
Les Assassins des Fauteuils Rollents
0
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Posted - 2011.09.24 22:21:00 -
[1] - Quote
This is a tale of warfare.
No, this is a tale of cowardice and ineptitude at the top. That is cowardice and ineptitude in both camps. The AFR are not risk takers and most certainly poor decision makers. The ND would prove to be so too.
Since the AFR is not familiar to all (the reality of which is truly staggering) we will begin with a short history:
Les Assassins des Fauteuils Rollents have long been fighting for Quebecois Independence and this battle did not end with Quebec, North America or Earth. Where some revolutionaries might find it restrictive and all together defusing not to have a state to rebel against, the flannel-clad, wheelchair-bound trappers of the northeast have embraced their jaded xenophobic anger and continued their revolution/ethnic purging against every proximity entity with deadly results. This may be the result of pent up anger over the fact all the good poutine diners are built atop hills and usually involves wiping out a small furry indigenous life form like the three eyed river otters of Gekutami III. This time it involved The Northern Directorate.
25 members at its peak, the Northern Directorate were a mish mash of flotsam from the recruitment channel, mainly newbs led by goonscam victim Valen Enuna aka Bishop250R. They were as ripe for the harvesting as the poor river otters and the Wheelchaired assassins descended. Squeak. Squeak.
The first encounter between the AFR and the ND was truly unremarkable. Ship A spots ship B. Ship B warps off to station. Ship A follows and waits. Ship B turns into Pod B and, being empire, goes on its merry way. Sadly, unremarkable is not universally true:
Quote:Well Played From: Bishop250R Sent: 2011.09.17 20:42 To: Valoche Mrehl,
See what I done there? You wont get much from me, or this corporation, in any case enjoy :)
Bishop
Taunting a wheelchair bound french Canadian with a penchant for skinning hides and a tendency to over react is a recipe for good times and so, as expected, the Stabber was fueled up. This mostly included stockpiling maple syrup and NHL highlight reels.
A few fights ensued. Details are on battleclinic. Needless to say only those smart enough to seek refuge on high ground escaped the wheelchair assassins. After a few days ransom was offered. The AFR would retract the war if the ND would supply a drake-class battlecruiser, a hurricane-class battlecruiser and 2.01m isk to wage a war against the six-tailed ice beavers of Poinen VI.
Tempers were starting to flare:
Quote:Re: Re: Well Played From: Valen Enuna Sent: 2011.09.17 23:55 To: Valoche Mrehl,
Maybe if you undocked when there's more then one of us we'd give a ****. **** off loser. If you have nothing better to do then sit on a station all day hoping to get merlin or drake kill your just a reject who couldn't hack it in null space.
Why even waste the time playing eve in the first place? "Oh a drake kill!!!! I think I just hit the jackpot mommy!!!"
Lovingly yours, Valen
Ransom would not be paid. After ten days of war and mounting losses the ND decided to seek refuge with a larger entity, the Rieos Alliance led by Lucius Britannia. This proved to be ineffectual and the threat of the AFR loomed over the entire alliance.
Knowing the holiday season was just around the corner and demand for high-end furs would be spiking, the AFR leadership made a new offer for peace to focus attention on woodland and river mammals to raise funds for future revolutions. This ransom was an abaddon-class battleship and 14.01m isk.
Sadly this too was refused and another ND ship was blasted into smithereens. |
Valoche Mrehl
Les Assassins des Fauteuils Rollents
0
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Posted - 2011.09.24 22:22:00 -
[2] - Quote
Quote:[18:32:43] Bishop250R > hey when is this war ending? [18:33:00] Valoche Mrehl > eh [18:33:33] Valoche Mrehl > I asked for a pretty mild ransom, that got refused. sent my new terms to lucius [18:33:53] Bishop250R > so your gonna pay the 50 mil to renew? [18:34:06] Valoche Mrehl > ? [18:34:17] Bishop250R > when it cycles [18:34:28] Valoche Mrehl > there are ways young padawon! [18:34:55] Valoche Mrehl > wardec mechanics are screwy. dec is on until the, uh. 31st though I think. or 7th [18:35:04] Valoche Mrehl > currently [18:35:09] Bishop250R > well Im getting pretty sick of it man, I kinda want to move onto some other topic about now, its been two weeks that Ive done nothing in this game because I cant use anything more than a covert [18:35:58] Valoche Mrehl > so fight me or pay my ransom :P it's an easy deal. You didn't like the idea so you joined rieos. they bring a little fight, but not much. you need real protection or need to convince me to go away [18:36:17] Bishop250R > what do you want man? [18:36:19] Valoche Mrehl > it was 2 bcs. now it's an abaddon and 14.01m isk [18:36:25] Valoche Mrehl > lucian has the mail [18:36:56] Bishop250R > well right now Im either going to pay you to leave us alone (wihch I cant be too sure you'll listen) or Im just gonna delete this character and do something better with my time lol [18:37:26] Valoche Mrehl > your choice. you haven't given me a fight yet. my war is with your alliance too, but the price is the same for one person or the whole lot of you [18:37:55] Bishop250R > see you say your looking for a fight, but your looking for fights that you can win [18:37:55] Valoche Mrehl > I get my ransom, I retract the wardec and more than likely log off :P no garuntees in the 24 hour though [18:37:59] Bishop250R > other than that you just dock up and thats it [18:38:26] Valoche Mrehl > bullshit. I've fought everyone that's come, except for a myrm and two bombers... I moved systems to ship up and the fight never came [18:38:34] Bishop250R > yeah [18:38:50] Valoche Mrehl > but the offer is the same. I've been on the level since the beginning with you [18:38:54] Valoche Mrehl > and the fights are fair. no neuts [18:38:58] Bishop250R > right on man, well I know Ive been playing eve too long to deal with this foolishness, because thats all it is [18:39:02] Bishop250R > yeah [18:40:40] Valoche Mrehl > seems pretty straight forward :P It takes all of what? 2-3 newbs in bs and a lone pilot is ******. You have over a hundred pilots and at least 30 active in the last 24 hours in your alliance. you could camp me in with little effort and/or annihilate [18:41:08] Bishop250R > but were really not inthe mood to interrupt our whole lives because of one fuckin dude [18:41:23] Bishop250R > do you think your that importanat, that everyones gonne come lookin for you? [18:41:35] Bishop250R > Im sick of it man, your not worth paying the ransom to
And so ended AFR communications with the ND. Reios separately refused the ransom and so plans were laid for another week of war. And beer. The AFR drinks on Fridays.
Saturday morning brought a surprise. No contract for an abaddon. No mercenary dec. No. A surrender from the ND. "How the hell? This is my wardec!" The brave Northern Directorate command decided to eject all members and close the corp rather than deal with a lone pilot. Final tally: 9 ships, 2 pods and 1 corp.
Does that count as a win? |
Tau Cabalander
Retirement Retreat
38
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Posted - 2011.09.25 04:53:00 -
[3] - Quote
This should be in C & P. |
Wylee Coyote
Imperial Academy Amarr Empire
1
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Posted - 2011.09.25 05:50:00 -
[4] - Quote
Tau Cabalander wrote:This should be in C & P.
^This.
Also, posting chat logs is against the forum rules. |
USGAnthrax
Macedonian Phalanx
0
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Posted - 2011.09.25 07:48:00 -
[5] - Quote
Too long didn't read... |
Hugo Junkers
High Sec Risk Management Services Waterboard
0
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Posted - 2011.09.25 20:46:00 -
[6] - Quote
It's spelled ''fauteuils roulants''. |
Lyrrashae
Crushed Ambitions
0
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Posted - 2011.09.28 01:54:00 -
[7] - Quote
Nicely done 'osti, nicely done!
(Gods, the older I get, the more I miss Montreal...Calgary is...well...full of Mittanis) |
Princess Nexxala
Quantum Cats Syndicate
4
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Posted - 2011.09.28 19:09:00 -
[8] - Quote
I like French cheese Is sexy time? |
St Mio
Imperial Academy Amarr Empire
73
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Posted - 2011.09.28 20:55:00 -
[9] - Quote
The real threat here is the Canadian Geese. They shall be the undoing of civilisation as we know it. Despair, and know that they hold the end, and it is near. |
Tabernack en Chasteaux
Next Generation Material Solutions Yulai Federation
19
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Posted - 2011.09.30 05:12:00 -
[10] - Quote
Way to represent. |
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DeliciousHamBeast
The Concilium Enterprises Spectrum Alliance
82
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Posted - 2011.10.04 17:59:00 -
[11] - Quote
Vive le Qu+¬bec libre! Vive la Poutine Libre! -- Pity me not, but lend thy serious hearing to what I shall unfold. |
Wander Prian
Firebird Squadron Terra-Incognita
0
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Posted - 2011.10.05 09:17:00 -
[12] - Quote
Some people just find it easier to run away than to fight, even if it's only 1 person.... But good job anyway.
Old corpmate saying o7 |
Joshke
Epsilon Inc STORM.
0
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Posted - 2011.10.05 10:27:00 -
[13] - Quote
names in chat logs?
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Biff London
School of Applied Knowledge Caldari State
0
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Posted - 2011.10.08 05:00:00 -
[14] - Quote
After reading this entire tripe, I can guess at a few things....
Seems to me that the OP is nothing more than a bitter, wheelchair bound wretch who is angry at the world (the real world that is) and can only make himself feel bigger and better by griefing high sec targets. Easy ones since it appears he can't hack it where people really want to fight in low or null sec. It might be that this is only outlet. Pretty sad that he talks so big in a virtual 'game'. Can't be anything else in real life? The OP doesn't get my sympathy. He gets my pity.
Perhaps he should do some good work IRL. Maybe even some chair-ity (Charity, i know. Was that me? My bad). Might make him feel better about himself.
So sad to see that some can only 'pretend' to be big in a game. A game where his possessions aren't even his. Sad sad monkey man. Wait....monkeys can walk, right?
Alright, enough of the bashing. I'm going to get up from my chair, WALK upstairs and make love to my girlfriend. You know what one of those are, right Valoche? And I'm not talking about the ones whose last name ends in JPG.
P.S. This actually should've been posted in COAD. Where people don't care either....
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Morlok Apol
Republic Military School Minmatar Republic
2
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Posted - 2011.10.09 13:47:00 -
[15] - Quote
Biff London wrote:After reading this entire tripe, I can guess at a few things.... Seems to me that the OP is nothing more than a bitter, wheelchair bound wretch who is angry at the world (the real world that is) and can only make himself feel bigger and better by griefing high sec targets. Easy ones since it appears he can't hack it where people really want to fight in low or null sec. It might be that this is only outlet. Pretty sad that he talks so big in a virtual 'game'. Can't be anything else in real life? The OP doesn't get my sympathy. He gets my pity. Perhaps he should do some good work IRL. Maybe even some chair-ity (Charity, i know. Was that me? My bad). Might make him feel better about himself. So sad to see that some can only 'pretend' to be big in a game. A game where his possessions aren't even his. Sad sad monkey man. Wait....monkeys can walk, right? Alright, enough of the bashing. I'm going to get up from my chair, WALK upstairs and make love to my girlfriend. You know what one of those are, right Valoche? And I'm not talking about the ones whose last name ends in JPG. P.S. This actually should've been posted in COAD. Where people don't care either....
This brought me almost as many laughs as the OP. I really liked the part where you pretended to have a girlfriend. Good show, sir. Good show.
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Syekuda
Hell's Revenge
3
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Posted - 2011.10.09 16:16:00 -
[16] - Quote
Like some people said, this should belong in C & P. Theres no tactics here, no fights to show. only a story. A story which is boring and to tell you honestly, humiliating. What's great about a corp that wardec's another and clearly don't want to fight back ?
For the op, just go in low or null sec and fight people who will fight back. So many pirates and pvp corps in these parts that will glady give you a "warm" welcome. |
Cannibal Kane
The Dex Initiative
27
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Posted - 2011.10.10 11:22:00 -
[17] - Quote
I have to ask this question since I am surprised nobody else has...
Since when do French attack? I'm not a Pirate, I'm a Terrorist
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Syekuda
Hell's Revenge
3
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Posted - 2011.10.10 17:11:00 -
[18] - Quote
Cannibal Kane wrote:I have to ask this question since I am surprised nobody else has...
Since when do French attack?
It's not when they attack it's when they won a battle. That is the question. |
Cannibal Kane
The Dex Initiative
28
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Posted - 2011.10.10 18:00:00 -
[19] - Quote
Syekuda wrote:Cannibal Kane wrote:I have to ask this question since I am surprised nobody else has...
Since when do French attack? It's not when they attack it's when they won a battle. That is the question.
Yes but they never attack... nor do they win.
I mean in RL the french tank have 1 forward gear and 5 reverse gears. Even the Nuclear Ball contains a white flag with a "We Surrender" on playback with all the World languages.
I'm not a Pirate, I'm a Terrorist
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Kamden Line
Scordite Excavating Xenaphobe
5
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Posted - 2011.10.11 01:46:00 -
[20] - Quote
Cannibal Kane wrote:Syekuda wrote:Cannibal Kane wrote:I have to ask this question since I am surprised nobody else has...
Since when do French attack? It's not when they attack it's when they won a battle. That is the question. Yes but they never attack... nor do they win. I mean in RL the french tank have 1 forward gear and 5 reverse gears. Even the Nuclear Ball contains a white flag with a "We Surrender" on playback with all the World languages.
Wrong type of French. |
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Cannibal Kane
Umkhonto we Sizwe
28
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Posted - 2011.10.11 05:58:00 -
[21] - Quote
Kamden Line wrote:Wrong type of French.
Do French Canadians speak French? Your French.
On that note of generalization... o/ I'm not a Pirate, I'm a Terrorist
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Ptraci
3 R Corporation
59
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Posted - 2011.10.12 23:42:00 -
[22] - Quote
Cannibal Kane wrote:
It's not when they attack it's when they won a battle. That is the question.
Yes but they never attack... nor do they win.
Yeah that big square thing in the middle of Paris, that's called the "Arch of Surrender", right? There was a time when all of continental Europe was under the French boot. You've never wondered why they speak French across Africa and Indo-China? Your lack of education is showing. If we are to talk of losing wars and battles, I can point out a superpower that hasn't earned much of a reputation since oh, before the Korean war... |
Cannibal Kane
Umkhonto we Sizwe
28
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Posted - 2011.10.13 05:10:00 -
[23] - Quote
Ptraci wrote:Cannibal Kane wrote:
It's not when they attack it's when they won a battle. That is the question.
Yes but they never attack... nor do they win.
Yeah that big square thing in the middle of Paris, that's called the "Arch of Surrender", right? There was a time when all of continental Europe was under the French boot. You've never wondered why they speak French across Africa and Indo-China? Your lack of education is showing. If we are to talk of losing wars and battles, I can point out a superpower that hasn't earned much of a reputation since oh, before the Korean war...
I know all that.
My concern though is your lack of Humor. I'm not a Pirate, I'm a Terrorist
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Kirith Vespira
Just Abide
2
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Posted - 2011.10.13 15:19:00 -
[24] - Quote
Hey OP, can I have the two minutes of my life back that it took to read your--- whatever it was you wrote??
kthxbye |
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